My Summer Job – Part Nineteen (Exhib, Humil, Public Nudity)
BY: Hooked6 (Copyright 2007 by: Hooked6@hotmail.com)
Peter took me in front of a stool and called a stagehand over. “Take good care of Ms. Adam’s clothes, will you Bob?”
“Yes sir, Mr. Weisdale.” He said and looked at me eagerly waiting for me to strip. Being naked in front of a crowd is awkward but having to strip naked while someone watches you not two feet away is downright awful – especially if it’s a GUY – a cute guy at that.
There was no way around it. I couldn’t act all modest now, not after my last exposure during the play. I reluctantly unbuttoned my top and handed it to the stagehand followed by my slowly unzipping my jeans and sliding them down to the floor – all under the ever-watchful eye of Bob of course. That stupid grin on his face didn’t help matters either. For his part he meticulously folded each garment and held them gently while awaiting my next article of covering. I pulled off my socks and shoes and gave them to him. There was nothing left but my bra and panties. I swallowed a bit trying to ease the dryness in my mouth that had suddenly developed and unsnapped the hook on my bra and let it fall into my hands exposing my breasts for the first time. My panties slowly followed. I’m not sure which was worse, standing there naked in front of this man or watching him manhandle my underwear. Strangers aren’t supposed to paw all over something so intimate. I was sure I’d go home without my panties on. Not after he touched them like that!
Peter returned with a handsome lady carrying a wooden case of some sort. “This is Chantal. She is our make-up artist.” He explained as she set up her stuff. “Work your magic babe.” With that he left leaving me uncomfortably sitting on the stool.
She smiled politely and looked me over. “You really need to get out in the sun more,” she said as she applied her brush to some make-up powder. “You will be challenge,” she said. “If I fix your face, the rest of you will still be as white as a ghost! I don’t have THAT much powder to do all of you!” she said giggling. “Normally this isn’t such an issue because the actors are wearing costumes, but not you, eh?” I blushed a little bit and kept silent.
She worked on my hair and face, carefully putting a lot of thought into what she was doing. I could tell she was really experienced at this sort of thing. Under different circumstances I could learn a lot from her.
She had no sooner finished when Peter came back with a gentleman and two women in tow. “Everyone, This Britney Adams,” he said waving his arm flamboyantly in my direction. “These are reporters, Britney,” he started to explain when the gentleman cleared his throat and interrupted him by saying, “Theatre Critics, Peter.”
Peter quickly corrected himself and left me with those people so they could ask me questions about my experiences, expectations, my goals and the like. I had initially reached for my cover hood that I would wear on stage to hold in front of me but Peter snatched it away calling out for bob to quickly iron the thing as it was hopelessly wrinkled. So much for protecting what was left of my modesty!
As I stood there talking more and more people began arriving and milling about. Naturally they all focused their attention on me at one time or another, even if just to stop by and say hi or wish me well. To say I was uneasy would be an understatement.
About ten minutes before show time, I saw a familiar face walking towards me. “Amy!” I called out almost dreading our interaction.
“So . . . I heard all about what happened last week from Peter.”
“You did?” I replied cautiously.
“Yes, and I must say I underestimated your initiative. That was pretty clever thinking on your part.”
“It was?”
“How in the world did you ever figure out that this play wasn’t doing that well and come up with a plan all on your own to make it more successful?”
“Um . . . it was rather unexpected,” I stammered.
Amy smiled and gave me a hug. “I’m definitely going to have to give you some more challenging assignments. Up till now I didn’t think you were capable of handling such things. But I see I was mistaken. Anyone who would put the client’s need above their own modesty certainly deserves my respect. Heck of a job, honey.” She then released her embrace and said, “Break a leg.”
As I watched her leave, I wondered why so many people wished me harm by telling me to break a leg, like I needed something else to worry about? It was hard enough to maintain my balance on that stupid dolly without worry about breaking a bone to boot!
My mind was jostled back to the present when I heard the announcer say, “Good Evening Ladies and Gentlemen. Welcome to Grayson Theatre – home of the Alternative Theatre Group. Tonight, the part of Betty the Robot will be played by Ms. Britney Adams.” I nearly fell over when I heard the resounding applause lasting many long-sustained minutes, preventing the announcer from speaking. Now I was really nervous! They applauded just because they heard my name! What on earth were they expecting when they saw me act??!!
While the play went on, I mentally tried to remember what I had done the week before – raise leg is really raise arm. It was all so complicated.
How on earth did real actresses do this stuff seemingly so effortlessly?
All too soon a stagehand gave me my hood and helped me on the platform.
My heart raced wildly, but for a different reason this week. Last time I was worried about my nudity. This week I was worried about not only my nudity but about screwing up my part. Could I duplicate my success in front of a different audience? Last time my exposure was unexpected. This time everyone knew it was coming. The pressure was almost unbearable.
Then I saw the professor coming towards me as he uttered those fateful words, “Just wait until you see THIS invention.” There was no going back, I was committed now.
Like before he wheeled me onto the stage and uttered the same dialog about not being ridiculed anymore and suddenly my drape was whisked away leaving me once again exposed. Like last time there was a collective gasp from the crowd – even though they KNEW what was coming, they still seemed to be caught off guard. Only the two actors on stage seemed better prepared. The theatre was deafeningly silent and the actors on stage held their next lines in abeyance for dramatic effect, which only made the tension in the room heighten as the awkward silence made the crowd uneasy.
They went through the exact same lines as the week prior as I gazed out into the crowd. I spotted Jessica and her boyfriend Troy sitting several rows back. Man did he seemed to be enjoying himself. I wondered what Jessica was thinking by letting him see another girl his age naked? She must really feel secure in her relationship with him, I thought.
I did all my cues and limb lifting correctly and got the expected laughter which made me feel quite at ease. The actors added a few lines here and there which were also well received. I guessed that Peter must have added a few things to prolong my presence on the stage giving the audience what they wanted – a longer chance to ogle my body.
During this time, I continued to scan the faces of those watching me. I saw a few people I knew but mostly they were all strangers. I found Amy and she gave me a thumbs up when she saw me looking at her. The audience was mostly a younger crowd and there were a lot more men than women, not that THAT should surprise anyone.
When the professor turned me around and poked at my back, he seemed to be speaking a lot more lines than before and had me raise my leg again while facing away – my back to the audience. He even told me to stand up straighter. That was a new command and I didn’t know what to do so, believing I was still to do the opposite of his commands, I bent way over at the waist giving rise to hilarious laughter from the audience. I realized all too late that was a dumb thing to do. Thanks to the spotlight shinning on me, the wet and oh so defined private space between my legs was now quite obvious, especially to those in the first few rows!
When he straightened me up and turned me back around, I noticed Tracy and Anna off to my left. I hadn’t seen them sitting there before. I wondered what they thought of all this and how in the world they actually got tickets to this play! It was only in the paper yesterday and it said it was already a sold-out event! It must have been just a coincidence, I surmised, as they couldn’t have known I was going to be in the play. I bet they were shocked to hear my name called out by the announcer at the start of the play as playing the part of Betty the Robot. After seeing me like this I wondered what this would mean for me on my final night of humiliation that I still owed them.
I saw the professor pick up my garment and prepare to push me off the stage. At last, I was almost through!
I’m not sure why but for some reason something caught my eye to my right and I glanced over in that direction. I almost fainted straight away at the sight before me. My skin got clammy, I suddenly felt hot all over and my tongue stuck to the roof of my mouth. Sitting there in the very front row was none other than . . . MY MOM!!!
The professor pushed me off the stage and the play continued. For my part once backstage, I fell down on the dolly and sat there mentally and emotionally exhausted. My MOM! Of all people my mom had just seen me expose myself to hundreds of people. All my hard work was for naught! I was done for now.
I hardly noticed how fast the play went as I just sat there naked on the dolly and felt sorry for myself. It was over before I knew it. There were no curtain calls. The house lights just went up to sustained applause and that was it.
Before I had a chance to realize that I should have gotten dressed people began gathering backstage. I was congratulated many times. Even Peter said I was better this week than last. Everyone was happy but me.
As the crowd slowly dwindled, I saw Amy walking towards me with Tracy and Anna. What the . . . I thought to myself.
The girls all expressed their admiration for a job well done. As they stood talking to me, I began to think that my boss and my tormentors might know each other somehow. Or worse, that the girls might have said something compromising to my boss. Perhaps this was all a mind game the two of them were playing just to keep me under their control. After all they knew how much I feared getting in trouble at work. That had to be it! They must have introduced themselves to my boss in the theatre and just casually walked backstage together hoping their presence would solidify their power. Well, it wasn’t going to work. When this was all done, I was going to stand up for myself with those two. I’d even beat the crap out of them if I had to in order to protect my job.
Then you could have knocked me over with a ton of bricks when I heard my boss, Amy, ask: “So Tracy, are you disappointed you didn’t take this role when I first offered it to you?”
“What the . . . you mean you KNOW each other?” I asked incredulously.
Amy looked at me with kindness and said, “Of course, Tracy and Anna have worked for me for several months now.”
I just stood there totally shocked. My mouth was opening but no words were coming out. I was mad at those two for making me do all that stuff when they knew . . . but that didn’t make sense . . . I was so confused.
Amy must have sensed my frustration so she sat me down and explained,
“I’m sorry if this seems cruel to you. When I hired you, I knew you had heart and would probably make a good employee but you had one main obstacle that I knew would prevent you from reaching your potential – you were way too uptight about your body.”
“But I don’t understand,” I said.
“I talked it over with your friends here and they agreed with me that you would do well if you just improved your self-esteem. Your body image was terrible. So, together we concocted this plan of blackmail if you will, to help you get over your problem.”
“BUT WHY???? Do you know what you put me through??”
“Again, I’m sorry but there just wasn’t time. Summer is my busy season and I just couldn’t wait a year or two to find out if you had what it takes. It was important that I found out quickly and this seemed to be the best way to do it in the shortest amount of time. Naturally, I thought it would take at LEAST another night at the hands of these two to make a final determination. But you really surprised me by taking the initiative and appearing in this play nude. That wasn’t in our plan. You did THAT all on your own and I’m proud of you!”
It all began to make sense now. Amy had no idea what had happened to me at the hands of those Jefferson High students. I guess I owed them a debt of gratitude. I understood how Tracy and Anna got their tickets to the play so fast too. Amy gave them two of her complimentary tickets.
“I . . . I don’t know what to say.”
“Well for starters just tell me whether you want to keep working for CSI.” She said plainly.
“Sure, I certainly do,” I quickly replied. My apartment was still very important to me and, after all, because of CSI I was a celebrity of sorts. I DID really like hearing all that applause when people heard my name.
“Good,” Amy said. “I just need to know one more thing. You don’t hold any grudges against Tracy and Anna, do you? You’ll be working together from time to time and I don’t want to have to deal with any interpersonal issues.”
“Um . . . I really should be pissed at both of you . . . but I understand. No hard feelings,” I said as I gave them each a hug.
“Great. On Monday I’ll discuss with you some of the jobs I think you’d do well at. What you’ve done so far is nothing compared to what lies ahead.”
“Okay . . .” I said nervously. I wasn’t sure what that meant but I was game to find out.
“By the way, are you coming to the cast party?” Anna asked.
“Cast Party?”
“Yes. It’s at Peter’s house. When a play closes it’s customary for the director to hold a cast party to thank the cast members for all their hard work.’ Tracy explained.
“Sounds like fun. I’m in.” I replied. I could use a little party to pick me up.
“You know what would be fun?” Anna asked with a sly grin.
“What?” Amy inquired.
“It would be awesome if Britney attended the party naked. I mean after all that WAS her costume in the play!”
I was about to protest when I saw Amy looking at me awaiting my reply. I didn’t want to disappoint her so I feigned enthusiasm and said, “SURE, why not!” This was going to be a truly memorable summer to be sure!
“SWEET!” Amy said excitedly. “I’m parked just outside.”
As we all left arm in arm, I only had one LITTLE problem to deal with – my mom!!!!
My Summer Job – Part Twenty (Exhib, Humil, Public Nudity)
BY: Hooked6 (Copyright 2007 by: Hooked6@hotmail.com)
The party went by all too fast. Yes, my only attire was my birthday suit but apart from a few exceptions the attendees were just the same small cast and crew I knew from the theatre. I did, however, do something I normally didn’t do at parties – I had a drink. Well, actually, several drinks. It seemed to take the edge off. Everyone seemed to have a great time but my mind was focused on my mom. I couldn’t shake that feeling of doom that overshadowed the entire evening. My mom had seen her good little girl naked. What am I talking about? She saw her good little girl exposing herself to a huge crowd of people.
My mind ran through all the possible things I could say to explain myself. “It’s all part of acting,” or “I was just doing my job. There was nothing lewd about it.”
Who was I kidding? She wouldn’t buy any of that stuff. I could hear her now, “I told you that you would never amount to anything and see you turned out to be nothing but a street-walking floozy.”
I decided that it was a good thing that I already had my apartment. I could just move in there after she threw me out of the house. At least I had a bedroom set.
When the party ended Tracy surprised me by giving me a brown paper bag. “What’s this?” I asked.
“It’s your clothes, silly. That guy over there said to give these to you. He figured you’d need them so he brought them to the party from the theatre.”
I looked over and recognized him as Bob, the stagehand, the man who helped me get ready for the play. I nodded my thanks to him across the yard as he raised his beer and smiled appreciatively. I went into Peter’s house and got dressed, said my farewells and left.
On the drive home I was so depressed I didn’t think I could get any lower. I decided that there wasn’t anything I could do about it anyway and I was committed to keeping my job so she would just have to accept it and get over it.
When I opened the front door, I got the shock of my life! The living room was full of our neighbors. There must have been 40 of them all looking at me.
“There she is!” my mom said enthusiastically, “my little Off-Broadway star!”
“Huh?”
My mom came up to me and put her arm around me and led me into the room with pride. Everyone applauded appreciatively.
“What’s going on?” I murmured.
“Why it’s a little celebration party,” my mom explained. “When I told everyone about you appearing in the play and they read your write-up in the paper they just had to congratulate you.”
“You mean you’re not . . . you aren’t . . . mad?”
“Mad? Why what on earth for? I’ve been telling all our neighbors that you had a really important job downtown and then when I saw you on stage getting all that applause, I was so proud!”
“What was it like appearing on stage nude?” old Mrs. Crenshaw asked bluntly. “Were you scared?”
“A little bit,” I said trying not to dwell on the subject.
“Well, I couldn’t have done it, not that anyone would want to see my old wrinkled up body!” she commented dryly as everyone laughed.
“Ethyl and I tried to get tickets to your play but it was all sold out,” Mr. Hampton said disappointedly. “Sure, would have liked to have seen it!”
“Um . . . sorry about that,” I replied as if it was somehow my fault.
Mrs. Smith spoke up in a loud voice, “You know I was about to call the cops the other night when I saw you getting out of a car naked. I was never so shocked in all my life. It’s a good thing I didn’t. I had no idea that you were probably just coming home from rehearsal or something! Imagine how silly I’d feel about getting our local star busted!”
Everyone laughed at her silly remark while I just felt a wave of relief. She must have seen me with Tracy and Anna when they stole my clothes and left me stranded in the middle of the street! Man was I ever glad she didn’t call the cops! I mean at that time I wasn’t even IN the play. I looked over at my mom and Mrs. Smith’s comment obviously caught her off guard and I could tell she wasn’t pleased. Onstage nudity must have been okay with her but running about town naked surely wasn’t. That apartment of mine was beginning to look better all the time.
It was late and I was tired. It was the wee hours of the morning – well past these old Geezers’ bedtimes anyway. Just then someone came running into the house all excited. “Look it is out! The morning paper has an article about the play!”
The man handed several copies out to the assembled guests as my mom read aloud, “The encore performance of the Alternative Theatre Group’s ‘The Professor Comes Through’ was a smashing success.
Once again Britney Adams, playing the part of Betty the Robot, gave a command performance and literally stole the show. Her genuine sense of comedic timing and her appealing form set the tempo for the rest of the play.”
My mom paused to bask in her pride at reading such high praise about her daughter in the local newspaper. She then continued reading aloud, “The town has needed something like this to elevate the status of the performing arts for a long time. Congratulations to Britney Adams for having the courage to accept this role and to Peter Wiesman for his bold initiative in taking a dull script and elevating it to new heights. This critic hopes to see more such daring-do in future productions. The audience voted with their ticket stubs demonstrating unequivocal support for a theatre group that has yet to distinguish itself, until now.”
Everyone seemed pleased. I NEVER would have imagined that my mom would react the way she did. I guess things just have a way of working out. It was a little weird discussing my nudity on stage with my neighbors though. I kept worrying that they were looking at me trying to imagine what I must have looked like on stage without clothes.
The following Monday I was expecting Amy to put me to work on some special project in light of our recent conversation at the theatre but it was just business as usual. After work I took my special check to the bank, cashed it and headed right for the furniture store. I bought a table and chairs for my dining room and a small couch and as luck would have it, they delivered that night. My place was beginning to look like a home.
As I was standing on my small porch looking out over the parking lot, a girl next door spotted me and introduced herself. “Hi, I’m Wendy. I guess were neighbors, huh?”
Wendy was a student at the University and seemed very outgoing. I invited her over and we chatted for quite a while. She just assumed I was attending University as well. I was almost ashamed to tell her that I dropped out of high school. Normally I would never volunteer such personal information like that but Wendy seemed to have a way of worming her way into a person’s life and getting it out of you. She wasn’t judgmental at all, just nosey, if that makes any sense. I was going to have to watch myself around her.
I went home and carefully informed my mom that I was going to move into a place of my own. She took the news much as I had expected. She was disappointed but understood that I had to leave the nest eventually especially since I was now successfully employed. Over the next few days, I gradually moved my meager belongings to my new apartment.
On Friday, my boss Amy informed me that I would be working another special event on Saturday along with Tracy and Anna. “Now I’m going to take you at your word,” she said, “about having no hard feelings towards these two.”
“Oh, um . . . Yeah sure, I’m okay with them. I’m just happy to get to do another special event,” I reassured her. “No problems at all.”
“I’m glad to hear that. Like your last event I expect that you will do what ever it takes to keep the client happy. I am put Tracy in charge as she has done several events with this client and knows exactly what is required. It is important that you follow her directions.” Amy then stopped talking and looked off in the distance for a moment or two before speaking again. “Look, I am a little leery of having you work with them so soon after your last experiences with those two but I have no choice as the client requested you. Please tell me if you have ANY concerns or hesitation about this. I won’t be able to attend this time as I have another client to look after that same night so I will have to depend on you three all doing your part.”
I could see that she was wrestling with her decision. Despite how things have worked out so far, truth is, a lot of that success was due to luck, and some quick thinking on my part. I was still new to her company and because of Amy taking a chance on me, my life has indeed gotten better. I had to try and reassure her that I could handle whatever she was worried about.
I went over and stood in front of her, looked her in the eyes and said as confidently as I could muster, “Everything will be fine. If something goes amiss it won’t be because of me. I owe you a lot and I am very loyal to you. I am sure you know that. I want to do another event. I will do whatever Tracy tells me to do. You don’t have to worry about me, I promise.”
Amy smiled gave me a quick hug. “That makes me feel better.” She then started shuffling through some papers she had on the counter as if she was looking for something. “Yes, here it is. You have to be at 499 Westminster Avenue tomorrow night at 10:00pm. I suggest it might be easier if you ride with Tracey and Anna as parking might be an issue. You can work that out with them.”
That address didn’t ring a bell but I was sure I could find it. “By the way, who is the client? How did they know to ask for me?”
“Oh, didn’t I tell you? The client is Mr. Robards. You remember him I’m sure – the client you worked the desk for at the Swan Hotel.”
“That kinky guy?!” catching myself I quickly added, “I mean . . . that guy with the kinky clothing seminar?”
“Yes, that’s him. Do your best.” She said giving me a VERY serious look to let me know that this was all business to her, despite how informal we had become.”
That was the most stressful night of my life. How could I forget that experience? Now I had to do another event with that guy without Amy as my safety net and with Tracy in charge. What have I gotten myself into?
(Author’s note: Feedback or comments on what you may have liked about the story or a particular chapter is most appreciated. Thank you for taking the time to read the story thus far.)
Good story I always enjoy stories were the main character is both embarrassed and excited at the same time. Hope you continue and maybe finish one of your other stories.
Hi Hooked6,
You hooked me till the end with a story full of twists and turns.
While it could have drifted towards something heavier like “Tracy in trouble” by Charles Frank, I must admit that your story ends in a surprisingly pleasant way.
Well done!
Helen.
This was a great story. I would love to read about her first assignment under Tracy.
It is funny you posted this now. I’ve been looking for this story off an on for the last month or so. I had no idea of the author or title so spent time searching for story elements from years gone memory. I should have guessed it was one of yours.
I obviously enjoy the story to have spent time looking for it.
Funny how I misremembered that with the play costume ruined, she used silver face paint all over her body instead of missing out being able to use the backup costume due to running out of time.
Would love to see more.
oh god I just read through this whole thing in one sitting and need more, I feel like even though Tracy and Anna have been revealed in Amy’s blackmail scheme, they are still going to force poor britney into another night or their own blackmail.
I also found myself unable to stop after reading a chapter sometimes. Like today!
Written in 2007. I imagine we’ll never get the next part then, unless it was also already written way back when.But I would love to see more of this character. Though the ‘hook’ for some readers is gone now that the truth that they weren’t working against her is revealed. For me that just means the tone of follow-up stories, if they existed, have a higher chance of appealing to me. But it might mean there’s not as much steam to power things for other readers.
mmm hooked did say he added material to it for this repost. so who knows. This just feels like it could go keeping, leaves on a good continuation point.
This was an excellent story. Hordes of ENF and strong escalations and yet didn’t go overboard. Perfect balance, as I always expect in a Hooked6 story. Mom’s reaction was an unexpected surprise. Things wrapped up quite neatly. Is there more? Or is it yet to be written? Or will this end things here with Britney. My only mild criticism (and it’s minor) is that there was too much good stuff everywhere. Many great scenes and once in a rare while I wondered if some of them could have been milked a tad bit more. Not a lot, just a tad. Because I do really like the fast pace. Never a dull moment!
From last chapter… I loved every escalation.
I loved the dialog, but sometimes… well for myself, I’ve been thinking about how to make naked dialog a bit richer like how some other writers do so well. Upping the caliber of the moment with a little body language and and stuff. So again, this is great… but could it be enhanced? That’s the question I’m currently asking myself with my own naked dialog.
Myself, I also struggle with adding extra details. It’s a struggle for me because generally I don’t like too much extra details. Your writing has such a good tempo and doing so many things right. Sometimes it feels like it might be 20% going too fast, but I think that’s about the best problem to have. You either leave it like that, or you easily fluff out a few sentences here and there and paragraphs, while trying to not lose the momentum. Like a minor editing pass for polish. Finding key moments and making them a tiny bit richer.
I liked the ending.
This is a great paragraph. I love the setup and idea, but it’s an example of something I would like to see milked a tiny bit. You have the reader sensing what’s going to happen, happy about it, and then seeing it start to happen… but then it’s over and we are past it. I mean she could have tried a little harder to get out of it and after a little struggle finally relent. It’s hard to give advice to a writer than is nailing it on so many levels and has my admiration, but I’ve gradually learned to be helpful with polish suggestions even for fantastic writers who often outpace my own writing. Thanks for sharing this awesome story. It wasn’t just a well written, it was also very hot with nearly every word focused on the good stuff!
THANKS to everyone who commented. Yes, there is more but I am still struggling on linking my chapters so people can find them on the board later on.
Thanks, ReaderMan, for your comments. I struggle a lot with finding the right pacing as well. My problem is that my characters tell me the story. I don’t tell THEM what to do – THEY tell me. I create the characters and give them their personalities; set the initial scenario and then let them interact without interference in my head. I write it down as I see it happening. Sometimes the pace the characters perform in my head is agonizingly slow and other times the action just flies by.
I have found the more editing I do, the less I like the story so over the almost 30 years of my writing I have found that, for me at least, it is best to leave things be lest my characters get mad at me. LOL It is a weird way of writing, I’ll admit, but it seems on balance to work more than it fails.
More soon.
Hooked6
I can certainly understand that.
I still get the odd request to write more for a character from an old story, but I find that once their ‘journey’ has been put out there, it’s complete. For many it would cheapen the original story and the character to put out a sequel.
Much as I want to say ‘what happens next’ for some characters, I don’t want to take away from the magic of their story. Much as I may ask a writer to give me more, I also dread them giving in to my request…
I will instead make this new request: I like your writing. Please give us a new story with your talent applied to some new characters and situations. If you can manage to find the time to write one. I know that’s not easy as I am also STILL trying to get a new story complete enough to post it…
I’m crossing my fingers that the chapter linking issue will magically resolve soon. Also I can related to letting the characters have ‘free rein’ (pun intended). I can’t control some of my character as well. And sometimes even Emi says, nope, I’m not doing that storyline. This is what I will do instead. It’s kinda cool, when they do that. Or her friends will come rushing in to the rescue. It’s all a very organic process. That said, I have been getting into the habit of polish passes for clarity and emphasis of key moments. I now no longer feel that first or second pass is actually the story, they are just drafts with potential. The real story is when you lovely go through it and color-in the stencil drawing that you started with. Don’t be overly satisfied with a stencil drawing, just because it’s great. Technically every sentence and paragraph can probably be improved. Usually this is too hard to do when you are in the middle of following your characters, but later, when you have had some time to distance yourself and your feelings. You can get technical and improve stuff. But don’t force yourself if it’s too much against the grain. I’m just sharing my recent observations of my own growth as a writer. The never ending process of learning to write is fascinating. I feel like I’m always at 20% because when I learn more, I realize there is also more to learn. The thought I cling to now is that it’s a multi-layered process. ie: Think of ideas, write the first wild draft with overly quick pacing. Do a pass for clarity. Do a pass to milk out good moments. Look for common writer mistakes, remove those. Cut stuff that feels useless (the hardest part). Sometimes I also try to encapsulate ‘scenes’ and make sure the goal of the scene is the main focus. Make sure it starts and ends strong, and transitions well into the next scene. But you don’t want to lose your characters leading you, so they have to be on board with the scene idea. It has to basically come from them. What I do know, is that it’s impossible to do all this in one go. It’s a multi-layered process. And it’s better that way because each layer needs a specific focus, all of your brain. But yeah, sometimes we just want to go go go… and keep our momentum up. And when we do we get more great story and action but then some of those polish phases get missed simply due to momentum and it’s too much work to go back through all that. I do that a lot too, loose passes because no energy or time or I’m going too fast in the draft phase. So it’s very helpful if you have editor friends that can help as well. Again, just sharing my writing process. Nobody should change a thing with their own process, if they feel it wouldn’t be helpful. Sorry for the giant paragraph… I’m rushing because I have to go to work now.
Do you have an archive of your stuff? This isn’t on https://www.asstr.org/~puericil/hooked6.html and I’d hate to think you have more great stuff like this I’m missing out on.
I hope its okay to post this link here, used to be a kinda Library for these stories before Indian Outlaws board died https://allcmnf.thebeachclub-ii.net/viewtopic.php?f=30&t=2515 Should be alphabetical
Square, Unfortunately there currently is no complete archive of my works. I compiled one several years ago but it was deleted when the host discontinued service as a result of the “great purge” of story forums and user groups that claimed such classic sites like IndianOutlaw’s and Many Yahoo Groups among others.
You can find 30 ENF stories of mine Like “My Summer Job”at this link: https://allcmnf.thebeachclub-ii.net/viewtopic.php?f=30&t=2515
Just scroll down the alphabetical author list until you reach Hooked6.
Thank you. Looking forward to any ENF you write in the future, too.
I enjoyed this story a lot. The ending provides some closure while leaving the door open for a continuation, though I don’t think one would be necessary. The reaction of her mother and neighbors made me think of those “I’ll pay you to get naked” videos, specifically the one where the girl unexpectedly accepts the first amount of money offered and strips with the proviso that she’s doing it for art.
My favorite part overall was the challenges. Lots of great twists and turns.
Square, and others interested. The link you provided will work if you change –org– to –xyz–. That’s true for most anything that was formerly on asstr. There’s enough on that page to keep me busy for a while!
https://www.asstr.xyz/~puericil/hooked6.html
Hooked6,
Thanks for all your work!