“All rise, His Honor the Honorable Judge Jackson presiding”
“Thank you, bailiff. The prosecution may begin.”
“Your honor, the defendant is charged with one count of public indecency arising from an incident wherein she rode her bicycle in the nude in the courthouse square just outside this very room. She has pled not guilty to this charge despite a multitude of evidence for her public nudity, including video footage and even a videotaped confession during her police interview.”
“Does the defense have any opening remarks?”
“Your honor, my client does not believe it a crime to show off her natural beauty in the summer sun. I do not, in any event, believe that the jury should consider it one eit-”
“Might I remind the court”, butted in the prosecutor, “that arguing for jury nullification is against the law in this state?”
“Objection sustained”, Judge Jackson concurred. The defendant was a buxom woman in a cotton shrift dress and alpargata shoes, and her attorney was a slim fellow who wore a simple two-piece suit with a thin tie and a thin belt. Overall, their appearance was not nearly as professional as the prosecutor’s.
“Does the defense have any other comments before the prosecution begins its case?”
“No, your honor.”
The prosecution laid out its mountain of evidence, with the videotape of the woman’s nude bike ride and even her confession during the interview (what was she thinking?). The defendant and her attorney sat at their desk until the prosecution rested and the judge asked the defense for its rebuttal.
“Yes, your honor, I have but one thing to say,” said the attorney as he and the woman stood. “Why wouldn’t someone ride out in the summer sun in her glory if she looked like THIS?” he asked as he grabbed the woman’s dress and ripped it clean off her. The woman was nude with a delicate and classy bush complimenting her voluptuous frame. She raised her arms to her face in a show of modesty while conveniently forgetting to place them anywhere below her neck. “The defense rests, your honor!”
The jury and gallery gasped as a ruckus ensued from what had just happened. “Order! Order! Order in the court!” Judge Jackson bellowed. “Mr. Ackerman”, he said addressing the defense attorney, “I hold you in contempt and sentence you to two weeks in jail, and you had better believe the bar association will hear of this. As for you,” he said to the woman, “I need you to stay here to listen to to jury’s verdict, please be seated.” She was more than happy to do so in the cool air-conditioned courtroom, not feeling any rush to cover her body with either her hands or what was left of her dress.
“As for the jury, please take the evidence you have heard here today and please return with your verdict when you are ready.”
“Thank you, your honor,” replied the jury foreman as the twelve filed out of the courtroom to deliberate on their decision.
Anon Moose
Story Based upon 1861 French Painting Award. Clear Sentences Award. Lively Dialog Award. Surprise Reveal Award. Patiently waiting Nude for Jury Award. Short and Sweet Award.
That’s a great idea to use a painting depicting an ancient Greek story for a modern interpretation of this story! Very well written and fun to read.
If someone is interested in the painting, just google the title of the story…
I didn’t know that painting (nor the incident on which is based). Amusing.
Fun little story award. Inspired by art award. Nice delightful experience.
Really neat to see something that works as a modern retelling of an ancient story, and does so effectively and without overt allusion to it’s inspiration.”Oldest totally new story” award.
Cultural exposure Award.
Thank you for this delightful short story.
If all she was doing was riding her bike naked, then I would vote ‘Not Guilty.’ She was accused of ‘Indecent Exposure’ not ‘Exposure’ or ‘Public Nudity.’ Therefore, one could argue that there was nothing ‘indecent’ involved. Hince, her plea of ‘not guilty.’ I wish the author had at least waited until the verdict was read to end the story. Now we’ll never know.
Tell me you don’t understand the cliffhanger without telling me you don’t understand the cliffhanger.